sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
