Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
