WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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