i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
