You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
