it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
