Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize