Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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