TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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