Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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