: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I intend to get homeless drunk
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
