You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
