Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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