i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Rumble strips road head = magical
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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