garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
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