Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
