You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
