She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
