about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
