It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
