she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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