Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
