There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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