party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
