I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
