I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize
