is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize