sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
