I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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