All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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