Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
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