And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
