If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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