I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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