she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize