i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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