if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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