nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
