He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
