420 ftw
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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