so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
