Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
