Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
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