Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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