You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I queefed so loud it echoed.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
