It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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