Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
