Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
