I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
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