Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
